T’was the night before Spire, when all through the cities,
Tense elves went haywire, forming gift-giving committees.
The stockings were hung at the gyms with great flair,
In the hopes that working out would fix their health care.
Folks were nestled all snug in their costly fitness centers,
As a sleigh flew skyward, filled with great Spire inventors.
Weightlifters dropped barbells to the floor with a clatter,
And women on slantboards with hopes of abs getting flatter.
Away to the window they flew in a flash,
Hoping the elves would be generous and toss down some cash!
But little did they know, there was something much better,
A brilliant device to make them a healthy trendsetter.
More rapid then eagles, the Spire elves would exclaim,
All the problems to be solved, and called them out by name —
“Now Panic, now Stress,
Now Anxiety, now Tension. . .
On Frustration, on Distress,
On Nerves and Apprehension!
On Worry, on Anger, on complete Agitation,
On Depression and Aggression and sheer Aggravation.
No more in our lives will negativity befall,
Now dash away, dash away, dash away all!
And then in a twinkling they heard on the roof,
Something more interesting than this lame little spoof,
A question asked with more significance than life or than death,
“Think about it folks, when was your last good, deep breath?”
And then without blame or criticism or with any reproach,
They explained how to have a personal mindfulness coach!
And the people agreed their respiration had gone stale,
And their loved ones surely deserved a nice, cleansing exhale,
Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, daughters, sons, sisters and brothers,
Grandparents, friends, co-workers, fathers, and of course their own mothers!
As more and more names on their lengthy gift lists were placed,
They imagined them with activity trackers on their waists.
And the females would loudly exclaim with loud oohs and ahhs,
As they eagerly opened Spires and clipped them to bras.
So hundreds of Spires were handed out to the left and to the right,
As clever Spire inventors exclaimed, “Merry Xmas to all, and to all a relaxing night!
Who are the people on your gift list who deserve to find out how Spire can change their day?